Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales Review!


May 28, 2017

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales also known as simply Pirates 5 are hitting theaters worldwide, and, of course, the big question is whether it follows the Fast & Furious path when the movies become good again after the fifth installment?

A lot of fans and critics are saying that the Pirates should have ended with the Curse of the Black Pearl, to which I disagree. The second and the third movies are actually quite entertaining and they do tell a compelling story. All the Davy Jones stuff was fun. The fourth, however, was a huge step back: the studio relied too much on Jack Sparrow antics and dropped 2 previous leads.

Well, Dead Men Tell No Tales is definitely an improvement after the atrocious fourth movie (despite the 1.045 billion USD in the box office). Obviously, the new Pirates are desperitely trying to recapture the magic of the first movie with lots of action, likable characters and exciting plot. In result, they sort of do, but at the same time, the whole endeavour is just an echo of the first movie, which came out 14 (!) years ago. Including Jack Sparrow, the character of Johnny Depp Рby this point it feels like Jack Sparrow has become a parody of himself. To give you a perspective, Johnny Depp had an Oscar nomination for Best Actor after his performance in the Curse of the Black Pearl, would you think his performance in the fifth movie deserves the same recognition? Me either.

Orlando Bloom #3 and Keira Knightley #3 are good looking people that don’t seem to have a lot of chemistry going on between each other. That is pretty much all that can be said about these two. If the studio was going for the first movie feel, they might as well have attempted to create a love triangle or something.

Geoffrey Rush as Hector Barbossa was great, the guy is still giving his all to the character. Javier Bardem as the movie’s main antagonist, captain Armando Salazar, was also amazing. Javier Bardem seems like the nicest guy in the world, but he does have a neck for portraying the baddest villains ever, and Pirates 5 are no exception.

Also, I must say that de-aging technology has come a long way since Tron: Legacy. If you think that the younger version of Michael Douglas was great in Ant-Man, wait untill you see a younger Johnny Depp, I feel like that should be noted as well!

Overall, despite all its flaws, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is a fun movie that you shouldn’t miss. The fifth movie gets a guillotine (sounds French! I love the French, did you know that they invented mayonnaise?)!




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Yeah, well, you know, that's just like, uh, your opinion, man: